Scandal - Gladiators in Suits don't Cry

Pilot Review

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The first few minutes I had to actually use closed-caption in order to understand the dialogue. Rat-a-tat-a-tat firing dialogue as Harrison explained to the new hire Quinn that they were not a traditional law firm.

They were crisis experts. Fixers. For those who can afford it. Think of a whole team of Michael Claytons.

They don’t eat, sleep or drink anything but the work. They are as Harrison called it...

'Gladiators in Suits.'

The head gladiator is Olivia Pope (Kerry Washington). She’s always right. She decides which clients they take on. She is Maximus in a white suit and high heels.

The first “fix” Olivia made was a $3 million drop for a package. The deal was for $6 million. Before the shady armed men could contradict, she calmly stated that in two hours homeland security would be all over their sorry asses. Olivia told them to take the money and run.

Olivia's team took the package that was in a box. Guess what was in the package. A BABY! They paid off blackmailers -- unbelievable.

Client List – Sex Sells

Pilot Review

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Oh Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, what have you gotten yourself into. Jennifer Love Hewitt’s new series The Client List premiered on Lifetime Sunday night. Hewitt for years donned the innocent girl next-door image.

She traded her pastel summer dress for a naughty negligee for this show.

*SNAP*

The premise simple. Set in south, in Texas to be precise. A woman deserted by her husband must find a way to earn a living for her family.

Her husband could not find work in the construction business. Why did he up and leave without saying a word? Unclear. Jen's character Riley Parks a certified massage therapist who’s also been out of work for a year.

Riley badgered by bank about mortgage payments. Without income they may lose the house. Isn’t this a tired motivation for a character to do something stupid?

Riley got a job at a massage parlor through a friend. Parlor offered two types of massages: straight up or one with the little “extra.”

Missing – A Female BOURNE is Born!

Pilot Review

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Ashley Judd’s new series Missing packed with motorcycle chases, gunfights, close quarters combat, and narrow escapes.

A Female Bourne is born.

The critics from Time and The New York Times were less than enthusiastic. But then again critics are hard to please. Pilot received mixed reviews.

The only female action hero on prime time television is Nikita played by Maggie Q. Move aside to Maggie for Judd is on her way around the world to elbow-punch, kick-box anyone who stands in her way.

Story about a woman named Rebecca Winstone. The show started with tragedy as her husband killed in a car bomb explosion in Vienna.

Storyline moved forward 10 years. Her son Michael all grown up ready to go to college. In Italy no less. Rebecca’s not pleased but agreed.

Don’t Trust the B----- in Apt. 23 - Funny Fun!

Pilot Review

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Morals of a pirate. Whore-nado! Don’t trust Chloe the b---- in Apartment 23. Slick and coy as she steamrolled every roommates for their deposits then tortured them until they moved out.

Chloe (Krysten Ritter) stated that her actions a part of the ‘great digestion system of New York City.’

June (Dreama Walker) hired by a large company moved to New York City from the Midwest. On the first day of work, chaos. It appeared the big boss embezzled money from the company. So June was stuck in New York City without a job.

She went back to her apartment which unfortunately was paid for by the company. More bad news. Building was seized. All her assets placed in a moving van.

Touch - Too Coincidental

Pilot Review

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Touch new series starring actor Kiefer Sutherland aired last night. The teaser pilot broadcast in January. Touch had two things going for it. One is star power provided by Kiefer. The other the creator behind the series, Tim Kring who created the series Heroes.

Expect Touch to veer toward the supernatural, mythical, and the unexplainable.Critics however gave the pilot mix reviews. Rightly so.

The entire series about a single father who struggles to keep his family together. By family I mean he and his son. Didn't divorce his wife, she died. Made storyline more tragic. His son is autistic who has unique gift to see events happening around the world in mathematical equations.

Son does not speak. Not that he's mute, he just doesn't speak. He also does not like to be touched. Son only communicates through numbers. His father must decipher a numerical code, which then starts a chain of events connecting people together.

L.A. Complex – I Hate L.A., Don’t You

Pilot Review

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In a recent poll L.A. voted as one of the most hated cities in the US. People who live in L.A. hate L.A. People who don’t live in L.A. hate L.A. So why do so many people move to Los Angeles?

They have big dreams. Become an actor, dancer, comedian, or break into the music business. You know the song…

F-A-M-E!

CW’s new series The L.A. Complex centers on the lives of  young aspiring Hollywood wannabes. Seek fame, fortune, and that celebrity red carpet high fashion flash.

This off take of a Canadian soap opera attempts to show the gritty side of making your dreams comes true in L.A.

Southland does a better job showing the gritty side of Hollywood. Glee does a better job showing talented kids chase dreams.

Here are the players in the pilot:

NYC 22 - Cops on Foot Patrol

Pilot Review

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How many police shows have you seen on television? Too many. So what makes NYC 22 different than the rest? Firstly, the two executive producers, Robert De Niro and Jane Rosenthal.

Secondly, we follow six rookie cops on foot patrol on the streets of Manhattan. It’s refreshing no one’s driving around in a police car. Most of the action outside on the streets.

NYC 22 follows the six new rookie cops:

Jennifer ‘White House’ Perry former Marine MP stationed in Iraq.
Jayson “Jackpot” Toney former pro basketball player.
Ray “Lazarus” Harper newspaper reporter of 14 years.
Tonya Sanchez background from a crime family.
Ahmad ‘Kiterunner’ Khan Afghani native who moved to the US.
Kenny McLaren fourth generation cop.

The most famous face of course, Leelee Sobieski -- “White House.”

Syfy Dream Machines - Rapper 50 Cent's Jet Car

Pilot Review

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If you can dream it, they can build it!

New reality series from the Syfy Channel's two-part pilot introduced the Parker Brothers Concepts. Unlike most reality series involving motorcycles or automobiles this is not a rebuild or an overhaul.

Parker Brother Concepts will build your dream machine from the ground up. One-of-a-kind. The company owned by a pair of brothers. Shanon Parker is chief designer and fabricator. Marc Parker is the engineer and fabrication specialist.

Shanon scribbles.
Marc builds.

Parker Brothers Concepts commissioned by rapper 50 Cent to build his Dream Machine.  He wanted a mix of a Formula 1 racing car, fighter jet, and alien spaceship.

Seriously?

Bent - Broken beyond Repair

Pilot Review

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NBC’s new comedy Bent starring Amanda Peet pilot aired last night. Critics from the Huffington Post and The LA Times gave the show positive reviews.

Did we watch the same pilot?!

NBC will broadcast six episodes in all, two at a time for the next three weeks. From there the executives will decide whether to place Bent in its network’s lineup.

I found the show:

• Utterly dull
• Utterly uninteresting
• Utterly contrived
• Utterly unfunny

No laugh track, which was a plus. Way too many characters, which was a minus. Story premise about a lawyer Alex Meyers (Amanda Peet) whose husband went to prison for insider trading. No mention of divorce either way, she must raise her daughter Charlie (Joey King) on her own.

Do you see any originality?

Fashion Star - It's a Flash in the Pan

Pilot Review

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Fashion Star reality series unique premise for designer-themed shows. Buyers from H&M, Macy’s and Saks Fifth Avenue bid for the best designs to sell at their retail outlets IMMEDIATELY during the show. Television viewers can then buy the original design online after the show or next day at one of the three retail stores.

It is unprecedented!

However, Fashion Star totally overproduced like the talent series The X Factor. Flashy stage. Flashy lights. Flashy-Flashy-Flashy. The show felt like a reality game show.